What is so destructive about loneliness?

Humans are social creatures, which means we are hard-wired to want to interact and connect with each other. Whilst our need for social contact will vary depending on where we sit on the introversion-extraversion spectrum, most of us do need some form of connection and intimacy with another if we are going to feel mentally well.

We derive pleasure, stress relief and support from our good, intimate connections. And so, when we find ourselves lacking this closeness, the loneliness that we feel can very quickly turn into low mood, hopelessness, anxiety and, ultimately, depression.

If we are feeling lonely – whether because we are physically alone or not – how might we be able to help ourselves recognise it and seek support?

It’s always good to talk, so I would recommend reaching out to either someone you trust, a counsellor, or even a helpline if things are feeling at crisis point.

The challenge with loneliness is to start making realistic steps towards the connection that you’re seeking, even though it might feel scary. This could be: opening up to friends and family more to give them the opportunity to know you better and to support you; joining a new class or group activity; or volunteering, so you can open up your social world and try to make some connections.

And how can we best help someone we think may feel lonely this Christmas?

If you’re worried about someone you know this Christmas, drop them a line on Christmas Day. Showing someone that you care and that you’re thinking of them can go a long way, especially at this time of year, and can make someone who is struggling feel less alone.

The Clearing offers counselling from the comfort of your own home, or from another safe place chosen by you. 

If you’d like to find out more information about how you or someone you know can receive support with any mental health and wellbeing concerns, visit The Clearing’s website.